Saturday, April 24, 2010

Reclusive Recluse

Lately, I've had no social life....

Voice: You've never had a social life!

Shut up! Who asked you?

Voice: I'm your mind, I don't need to be asked.
Gah! Ew, and just mentioning--can you clean the cobwebs up here? And...... And....
And something smells like dead rat....

About that........

So.... like I said, no social life the past few weeks which = me reading much more.
Which then = me being lazy. And I'm pretty lazy to begin with.
Which ultimately = the fact that I'm becoming a recluse.

[n. rek-loos, ri-kloos; adj. ri-kloos, rek-loos]

1.a person who lives in seclusion or apart from society, often for religious meditation.

Awww, shiz.

Here are my pictures (cause I know you all love examples!!)

Well, if he was bit by a recluse.
And if he was asian....
And.... nevermind. Use your lovely imagination.
(the stuff that appearantly romps, yes, romps around Tennessee and my neighborhood. Woo....
The person next door was bit by one.... and it seems to really, really suck. Haha.... hah... I hate spiders)

And then there's me!
Pretty similar to both of them, holed up in a dark corner, reading a book.

Then there's my mom.
As always, she's chastising me about reading in the dark- ruining the mood via lights. Post bursting into my room.
Like seriously, if I want lights on, I'll turn them on.
I'm not gonig to be all like:

"It's so dark..... so very dark.... I can barely read.... is that clap or crap.... so confused....
God, I'm so miserable! This is terrible.... the lights aren't on.... oh, my....."

Okay... maybe.
I might actually be like that.

I'll do another book review for you guys cause I'm caring and all.... *snickers*

Kiss & Blog  by Alyson Noel

Usually, I'm not into the whole "realistic fiction" fad. If I want realistic fiction, I'll write some type of autobiography (blogging...?) and call it a day. Or call it my life. My very pitiful life.

But then I saw that it was by Mrs. Noel (the writer of the highly addictive The Immortals series. Evermore, Blue Moon, etc.) and thought, why not- I'll give it a chance. I've liked a couple books of this kind.... just not something blatantly called Kiss & Blog. But because I'm not judgemental (hehe), I picked it up and began reading during the only time I knew I would read it unforcibly- during the empty minutes of TCAP.

The beginning sucked.
Except I did like the part where Cash Davis, the jerk of the school who the main character Winter is crushing on, said something abrupt....

"Oh, man, you're that chick who spilled that purple shit all over the place yesterday." Then he shakes his shiny, beach-bleached hair, and narrows his Pacific blue eyes in disdain. "You're a fuckin' hazard, bro." (19)

How can you not LOL? And because of Avery (the gay horse joke), every time one of the people said "Heyyy", I couldn't help but mess it up. And that was alot.
(I'll edit the hey every time....= adding appropriate letters)
Try it out, you're guaranteed* to at least smile once.
* Smiling is by no means guaranteed by Kayla, Kayla Kulture, or anything in association with Kayla or Kayla Kulture.

And then, as if that wan't enough, she continued to look me in the eye as she opened her frosty pink mouth to say, "Heyyyyy." (160)

"Heyyyyy," they say all together now, scrutinizing my entire outfit, and smiling in a way that could never, under any circumstances, be considered sincere. (185)

"Heyyyyy," he whispers, leaning back and smiling. (215)

"Oh, heyyyyy," I say, stopping just shy of the door, wondering what they could possibly want. (217)

"Heyyyyy," I say, gazing from him to the still wet walls. "Is my mom around?" (207) 
"Of course. I just got finished with her, Winter. You next?" He replies, wrenching his zipper down with a quick flick of his wrist that seemed so smooth and seemless, he must have practiced it.

Okay, I added that part, but see how awkward that joke made every phrase?! LAWL!

In a nutshell, here's the book:
  Long time best friends Winter and Sloane [slow-an + a country drawl] want to be popular. That's all they care about. Are obsessed about. All summer they make careful preparations-- "correct popular responses" notecards, buying all the latest fads, a cheer so they can try out for cheerleading, a matching set of Victoria's Secret PINK pj's for pajama day (for the cheerleaders at their school), and a "popular" personality.
One that only Sloane has seemed to perfect. The popular group immediately accepts her into their bosom (hehe)..... with the exception of Winter. They said they'd do it together- if one made it, she was supposed to open the doors of popularity to the other. Except.... that didn't happen.
Sloane secures her cheerleading position by stealing Winter's cheer. (they were supposed to be a team)
She gets the guy, mista Cash.
Has the friends.
The popularity.
While Winter's left with the sour taste of betrayal. (And lemons! They're sour, too!)

To get revenge, she begins a blog titled The Gospel of Eleanor Rigby, exposing all of her friend's darkest secrets-- nicknamed P.P. (pee pee) for Princess Pink. 
Like number 11.
11. If asked, P.P. will pretend that she never, ever, not even once, cried herself asleep because the only thing she wanted in the whole world was to meet Britany Spears. But don't you believe her.

Which leavses me wondering.....
With hair or without?

Her blog suddenly becomes very popular with the students of Ocean High, exposing the socially mutilating secrets of Pee Pee to the world......

And things go on from there.

But don't'cha worry, there's romance in this book- I usually don't like books without romance (which is why I'm iffy about The Den of Shadows Quartet by Amelia Atwater-Rhodes. Wait til I review it before even THINKING of picking it up. uck)

All and all, this book wasn't so bad. It was actually pretty good.
If you don't like the beginning, don't get discouraged!

Kayla's Rating: 8.5/10
It was actually a pretty good book, except it was hard for me to get into the whole "popularity is my life" thing. Toward the middle, I was actually finishing it up out of choice (so I read the 227 pages in one day).

I usually don't have much time for reading.....
Except since I've become a recluse.
About that, at least I know which cult to join...
I'm really curious about this picture I found while looking up "recluse"-"spider".
Anyone care to join?

By the way, I'm sooooo proud of my cat for starting this thing (her name's Luna, so this is obviously hers. I'd follow her anyday. Except to the litterbox. Except that.... evil microbes....)

Nighty night my faithful few...

The few, the proud**, the Kayla Kulture readers.

thank[most of]you.

the cat that kinda freaks kayla out by its sharp teeth.
Nail file anyone???
**proud does not include the meh'er who continues to piss me off and is probably getting their natural high from all of this attention.


  1. can i join the cult

  2. Come one, come all!!
    Yes, you may.
    Anyone else care to join?

  3. Someone meh'd this....?
    But.... I spent so much time......

  4. guess you read "peeps" then?

  5. Ohhhhhhhhh.... the microbes in the litter box thing. Yes! You're good....